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Monthly Archives: January 2010

Love on the Dock

Having spoken to many people about their relationships recently it seems that most people regret the relationships that they’ve entered. However the people that I spoke to about this were all women… seems kinda hard to get anything out of guys for some strange reason.

Anyway from a guy perspective I suppose that the emotional side is somewhat less important than it is to a woman. But I wonder about whether guys actually regret or celebrate all the physical stuff they did with the assumption that a relationship brings physical things with it.

Or do the guys themselves regret their past relationships or is it really a notch on the belt? The women really don’t seem to want notches on their belt at all. A lot of women have been telling me that there’s no point in having ‘had’ a relationship because it failed. So what’s the point? But the guys might be counting the notches so I don’t really know.

Regardless it’s really hard to find something that will last a long time. I suppose I’ve been holding out eternally and will continue to do so.  Some wise person said that I have a long time to find someone… I replied that I have a long time to live alone!

Who knows… but the biggest question mark is the physical aspect of a relationship. Though I personally don’t think I wouldn’t appreciate the rest of a relationship though… but that’s pure conjecture.

Inspirational Message Follows:

Relationships

Yeah... ain't that Right!

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Tangled Web

Is it cheating if a woman has non physical relationships with more than one man at a time? In my opinion… yes. Physical acts are just part of a relationship.

Unfortunately for me I’ve had the misfortune of being at the mercy of a total nutjob of a woman who claims she sticks to one man and has around 3 at a time. in fact she was getting all close to me when she ALREADY had a boyfriend.

Suffice to say I was conveniently used and then disposed of when it was a good time to do so. But she always picked me back up whenever it was useful for her. But it seems she wants to go again, like for the 15th time. I think I’m finally catching on… better late than never.

Can’t say its been fun being used. Worse yet when the person using you makes up a host of lies to cover up the fact. Even worse than that was how she compared me to other individuals to describe my shortcomings such as say for example not being as thin or tall as one guy, fair as another, or talented as another and so on and so forth. I was never really insecure about these things but stamping a rejection with them was quite painful to say the least.

I was baited in to this entire thing when I tried my best to stay out of it. Eventually I was caught and I broke down. You find yourself in a strange place when you’re sobbing on the floor like some sissy boy. Needless to say she messed me up nice and good.

She also habitually spins a load of lies and milks sympathy out of everyone in her vicinity. Lord knows she did that to me enough times. Needless to say she’s a total bitch.

Everyone I know told me to avoid her like the plague but I didn’t listen. My brain knew logically that they were correct but still I couldn’t… I suppose I was weak using that dreaded ‘L’ word.

But it wasn’t all bad. It’s true what they say… “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”. It really did. It was like being badly injured and then recovering… it’s that great feeling of being up and about after being off your feet for so long.

Anyway I’m no longer afraid of my worst fear… which was to die alone. In fact I don’t think I’m afraid of anything anymore. I’m fine with dying alone if that’s what’s going to happen. Whatever happens I don’t want to go through this ever again. Being used sucks.

Abandoned Girl

A long time ago when I was in Iraq I did something I still regret today. I remember going to a jewelery story with my mother. I was pretty short and couldn’t even see over the counter properly and didn’t really want too either. While I was twiddling my thumbs, a woman dressed in a power suit walks in leading a little girl by hand. She was about the same size as me.

The woman lets go and starts talking with the shopkeeper about various items on display. My mother is doing the same. Meanwhile an old couple starts playing with the little girl. Eventually she gets taken in to the game. A while later the young woman walks out… leaving the little girl behind. I’m thinking ‘what just happened here? Does no one even notice this except me?’

The little girl realizes a short while later that the lady she came in with has disappeared. But she waits in the store. I’m thinking that the lady will be back shortly anyway, so no big deal.

Anyway as my mother and I walk out the store and eventually the mall I wonder what happened to the little girl. I turn around and look at the mall and the little girl walks out in front of it; she’s still alone. It’s night and it’s cold, she has a thick jacket on. There are no tears in her eyes and she just stands at the entrance looking left and then right. She seems very brave.

I’m thinking now “Should I say something?” I hesitate a while. I’m not sure. If it’s a false alarm I’ll get in trouble. But I don’t want to turn my back on someone who needs help. After debating we eventually reach the car. I look one more time and she’s still there. I know there should be a happy ending somewhere here… but I decide to save my own ass.

As we drive away I climb to the backseat and look out and sure enough she’s still waiting out there all alone. I wonder what happened to her even now. A lot can happen to a kid all alone in the night… it wasn’t a friendly looking neighbourhood and even less so at night. I wonder why anyone would abandon a little girl like that but I guess times were tough.

Since then I decided I’d never let that happen again.

garcon!

A time long ago… I was once sat in Mr. Nesbitt’s French class. This was business as usual until it came to a point where I had to tell the class what newspaper I read. So I began like this…

J’ai lu le…J’ai lu le…err…err

I’m stuck because having just arrived in the UK I wasn’t familiar with any of the papers. Then the guy sitting next to me (who ended up becoming my best friend) leans over and whispers…

The Sun

And I’m like… “oh ok…. J’ai lu le Sun“.

There’s a brief pause on Mr. Nesbitt’s face. He processes for a second or two. Then he carries on “Ah… Oui, Oui, le Sun” As the class continues the guy next to me leans over again and whispers…

That’s the paper with all the naked women in it…

The best Falls Ever

What a sensational destination! Wish I could go there… this waterfall in New Zealand has one of the best names ever conceivable.

But even better yet; it got really famous after a cricket umpire named Peter Plumley-Walker washed up dead downstream from the falls with his arms and legs bound. With the police digging around Huka, they began to uncover a sinister bondage scene in New Zealand. Renee Chignall, a local dominatrix was then tried for his murder. After three trials she was acquitted.

Also when you’re down there don’t forget to visit Huka Park…

Big Boobies

Damn... That's Big!

32 E… not is not a new phone or computer. Those are the measurements of a lady I met recently. My eyes blinked quite a few times… damn… that’s big! For some reason my eyes roved ‘here’ and ‘there’ out of my own volition. I really just can’t explain it…

Anyway breast sizes seem to be of some consternation for many women, especially those less equipped and desiring a pair of juggies. But really the 32 E was just too damn big! Bouncing around and all gets your attention, but beyond that…?

The smaller breast has a few upsides in reality though. Woman with big boobies tend to suffer from inevitable backpain… a price of packing big un’s. Second bigger boobies tend to sag especially with age while smaller ones remain upright and pert (lots of guys prefer that- we do talk about somethings!). Lastly one quote that I can never forget… “smaller breasts are better because you can put more of it in your mouth!”. You’ll get no argument from me there!

Then there are those people who get literal watermelons through surgery… I don’t know about you, but I feel like losing my lunch at those. Can you say ‘out of proportion’?

I’m not entirely sure what ‘pert’ means exactly but it seems like the inword. Let’s let Merriam Webster have a stab at it:

1 a : saucily free and forward : flippantly cocky and assured b : being trim and chic : jaunty <a pert little hat> c : piquantly stimulating <is a pert notion>
2 : lively, vivacious

pert·ly adverb

pert·ness noun

Peace. Out.

"Hand of God" by Paul Lombard

Yes… God doesn’t exist. We’ve proved it beyond a reasonable doubt and its an irrefutable fact… or so atheist advocates such as Richard Dawkins would love to claim. Using their scientific methods they perserve on their never ending quest to defeat the ‘God Myth’ and to awaken people in to reality.

But one has to ask what is the point? I was once behind Dawkins and was in line with his views, though I couldn’t say I liked his style in which he attempts to humiliate believers. Since then however my views shifted. It seems to be that there is an even bigger question that is conveniently being avoided. The question is, once you’ve disproved God… what then? What are you offering in replacement? The answer… nothing. Apparently believing in God is unscientific and therefore should be abandoned.

Assuming that God is just a myth once you disprove it you are removing the beliefs of a host of followers. Science is cold, hard and generally irrefutable fact. In other cases its undefeated assumptions. None of these bring comfort to individuals during trying times. When someone close to you dies, science can bring no comfort, beliefs can. So I ask again, when you defeat God what exactly are you offering as an alternative?

Since Dawkins offers nothing of the kind, I can’t say his quest is of any particular use. Furthermore it seems to me that the professor always appears as if he’s got a stick up his ass and just cannot tolerate the fact that others believe in God when he absolutely cannot himself. Admittedly there are issues when it comes to teaching the theory of evolution in schools, but going beyond the practicality of such problems in to the very beliefs of people seems quite unpractical in terms of benefits.

Three Idiots

Surprise! That’s all I can say about this movie. Since I always walk in to the cinema to watch Hindi movies with the anticipation of major disappointment and walk away with an inevitable conclusion, it was a bit of a shock to find that this movie was actually good. Yes that’s right… a Hindi movie was very good, excellent I even dare say.

The movie somehow managed to overcome my constant skepticism and halfway through I was sold. Great characters, a good plot that actually explores some real issues while everything ties together nicely at the end. This is probably because its based off the Indian book, ‘Five Point Someone’ by Chetan Bhagat. Of course being an Indian movie there’s still plenty of cheese here and there, but it doesn’t really ruin the movie.

If you hate Hindi movies, try watching this, you just might be in for a shock.